Funny Ass REPLY TO - Share yours here

Ok, we've all seen them, those REPLY TO responses and while most of them are tame and include the usual responses like, STOP, Fuck off, Fuck off and die. Every now-and-then you get one that makes you laugh, for Christ sake its just email people:shot: So here is your chance to share the ones you believe deserve to go down in history.


You people are sick . You must be Obama followers . If you didn't pay in you should get nothing from Social Security . Quit sending me your shit .

 

How Do You Process Manual Replies?

A more relevant question should be what is the best way to handle such manual replies. Options -

1) Discard / ignore them all
2) Automatically register them as complainers and unsubscribe / add to DNE
3) Try to do some "intelligent" processing to categorize / differentiate them

What do you guys do / recommend? I am sure there will be people to advocate for every category here.

 

This is where you can have a lot of fun with triggered autoresponses.:fight:

 

Hey DKPMO, good question but this thread is more for posting ridiculous "reply-to" But to answer your questions:

1- NEVER ignore them, as a mailer it's in your best interest to get rid of all screamers and complainers. The quicker you get them unsubed the better.
2- Don't automatically unsub them, most people have automated replies and there is no need to get rid of potentially good data.
3- Best thing to do is to create a filter or script with commonly used terms i'e Stop, no more messages, fuck off...etc and have those automatically unsubed.

 

I wouldn't waste any time on Auto-responders for reply-to's, best to unsub and move on :ridinghorse:

 

yeah, there are just a few very specific ones I like to fuck with.

 

delete FROM [TABLE1-FINAL]
WHERE

(EMAIL LIKE '%abuse%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%remove%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%unsubscribe%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%cancel%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%spam%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%fuck%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%shit%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '[email protected]%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%faggot%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '[email protected]%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%cocksucker%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%cunt%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%delete%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%take me off%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%take_me_off%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%takemeoff%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%off your list%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%off_your_list%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%offyourlist%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%no more mail%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%no_more_mail%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%nomoremail%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%no more email%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%no_more_email%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%nomoreemail%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%stop emailing%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%stop_emailing%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%stopemailing%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '[email protected]%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%queer%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%stupid%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%dumb%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%retard%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%scum%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '[email protected]%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '[email protected]%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '[email protected]%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%bastard%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%never signed up%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%never_signed_up%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%neversignedup%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '[email protected]%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%test%') OR
(EMAIL like '%penis%') or
(EMAIL like '%cock%') or
(EMAIL LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%bait%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%dickhead%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%fart%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%gotcha%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%hitman%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%jackal%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%seed%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%sniper%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%spoon%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%stalker%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%sucker%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%trash%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '00%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%007%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%admin%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%bait%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%datapurchased%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%datasold%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%getmeoff%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%godsmack%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%gotcha%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%hawk%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%postmaster%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%remove%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%root%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%s_p_a_m%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%s-p-a-m%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%stealth%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%support%@%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%takemeoff%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%throwaway%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%tracker%') OR
(EMAIL LIKE '%webmaster%@%') OR
-- MORE FOR MAILING
(EMAIL LIKE '%"%') or
(EMAIL LIKE '%,%') or
(EMAIL LIKE '%/%') or



(FNAME LIKE '%abuse%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%remove%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%unsubscribe%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%cancel%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%spam%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%fuck%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%shit%') OR
(FNAME LIKE 'fag%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%faggot%') OR
(FNAME LIKE 'uce') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%cocksucker%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%cunt%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%delete%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%take me off%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%take_me_off%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%takemeoff%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%off your list%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%off_your_list%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%offyourlist%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%no more mail%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%no_more_mail%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%nomoremail%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%no more email%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%no_more_email%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%nomoreemail%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%stop emailing%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%stop_emailing%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%stopemailing%') OR
(FNAME LIKE 'homo%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%queer%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%stupid%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%dumb%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%retard%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%scum%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%motherfucker%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%liar%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%liars%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%crap%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%bastard%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%never signed up%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%never_signed_up%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%neversignedup%') OR
(FNAME LIKE 'dont') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%test%') OR
(FNAME like '%penis%') or
(FNAME like '%cock%') or
(FNAME LIKE 'ass') OR
(FNAME LIKE 'friend') OR
(FNAME LIKE 'internet') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%[0-9]%') or
(FNAME like '%penis%') or
(FNAME like '%cock%') or
(FNAME LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%bait%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%dickhead%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%fart%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%gotcha%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%hitman%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%jackal%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%seed%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%sniper%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%spoon%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%stalker%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%sucker%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%trash%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%tracker%') OR
(FNAME LIKE '%007%') OR
-- MORE FOR MAILING
(FNAME LIKE '%"%') or
(FNAME LIKE '%,%') or
(FNAME LIKE '%/%') or


(LNAME LIKE '%abuse%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%remove%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%unsubscribe%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%cancel%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%spam%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%fuck%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%shit%') OR
(LNAME LIKE 'fag%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%faggot%') OR
(LNAME LIKE 'uce') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%cocksucker%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%cunt%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%delete%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%take me off%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%take_me_off%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%takemeoff%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%off your list%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%off_your_list%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%offyourlist%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%no more mail%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%no_more_mail%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%nomoremail%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%no more email%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%no_more_email%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%nomoreemail%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%stop emailing%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%stop_emailing%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%stopemailing%') OR
(LNAME LIKE 'homo%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%queer%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%stupid%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%dumb%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%retard%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%scum%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%motherfucker%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%liar%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%liars%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%crap%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%bastard%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%never signed up%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%never_signed_up%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%neversignedup%') OR
(LNAME LIKE 'dont') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%test%') OR
(LNAME like '%penis%') or
(LNAME like '%cock%') or
(LNAME LIKE 'ass') OR
(LNAME LIKE 'friend') OR
(LNAME LIKE 'internet') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%[0-9]%') or
(LNAME like '%penis%') or
(LNAME like '%cock%') or
(LNAME LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%bait%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%dickhead%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%fart%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%gotcha%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%hitman%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%jackal%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%seed%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%sniper%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%spoon%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%stalker%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%sucker%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%trash%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%tracker%') OR
(LNAME LIKE '%007%') OR
-- MORE FOR MAILING
(LNAME LIKE '%"%') or
(LNAME LIKE '%,%') or
(LNAME LIKE '%/%') or


(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%abuse%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%remove%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%unsubscribe%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%cancel%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%spam%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%fuck%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%shit%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE 'fag%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%faggot%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE 'uce') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%cocksucker%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%cunt%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%delete%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%take me off%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%take_me_off%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%takemeoff%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%off your list%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%off_your_list%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%offyourlist%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%no more mail%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%no_more_mail%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%nomoremail%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%no more email%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%no_more_email%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%nomoreemail%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%stop emailing%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%stop_emailing%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%stopemailing%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE 'homo%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%queer%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%stupid%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%dumb%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%retard%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%scum%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%motherfucker%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%liar%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%liars%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%crap%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%bastard%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%never signed up%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%never_signed_up%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%neversignedup%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE 'dont') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%test%') OR
(ADDRESS1 like '%penis%') or
(ADDRESS1 like '%cock%') or
(ADDRESS1 LIKE 'ass') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE 'friend') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE 'internet') OR
(ADDRESS1 like '%penis%') or
(ADDRESS1 like '%cock%') or
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%bait%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%dickhead%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%fart%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%gotcha%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%hitman%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%jackal%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%seed%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%sniper%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%spoon%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%stalker%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%sucker%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%trash%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%tracker%') OR
(ADDRESS1 LIKE '%007%') OR


(CITY LIKE '%abuse%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%remove%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%unsubscribe%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%cancel%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%spam%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%fuck%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%shit%') OR
(CITY LIKE 'fag%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%faggot%') OR
(CITY LIKE 'uce') OR
(CITY LIKE '%cocksucker%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%cunt%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%delete%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%take me off%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%take_me_off%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%takemeoff%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%off your list%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%off_your_list%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%offyourlist%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%no more mail%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%no_more_mail%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%nomoremail%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%no more email%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%no_more_email%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%nomoreemail%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%stop emailing%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%stop_emailing%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%stopemailing%') OR
(CITY LIKE 'homo%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%queer%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%stupid%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%dumb%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%retard%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%scum%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%motherfucker%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%liar%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%liars%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%crap%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%bastard%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%never signed up%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%never_signed_up%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%neversignedup%') OR
(CITY LIKE 'dont') OR
(CITY LIKE '%test%') OR
(CITY like '%penis%') or
(CITY like '%cock%') or
(CITY LIKE 'ass') OR
(CITY LIKE 'friend') OR
(CITY LIKE 'internet') OR
(CITY like '%penis%') or
(CITY like '%cock%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%asshole%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%bait%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%bitch%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%dickhead%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%fart%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%gotcha%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%hitman%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%jackass%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%jackal%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%seed%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%sniper%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%spoon%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%stalker%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%sucker%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%trash%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%tracker%') OR
(CITY LIKE '%007%')

 

Thanks for the list Bubbles :rock:

 

YW but I'm still REP Power 0 LOL

 

Nice list, +rep

 

GOt this one TOday :ha

Something is very fishy here!!!
I clicked on the 'opt out' and got a sales order form for 'giant blueberries'! (SLEAZY!!!)
I never subscribed in the first place, and when I finally found the 'hidden' opt-out page it seemed to indicate that my e-mail address was not valid.
So, I think someone is hacking your site and e-mailing people you don't even know about!
I don't blame the 'blueberry people', but somebody is as naive or stupid as the Pakistani government!!!!!

 

If you are telling a lie please don't send me emails.I report all scam's to the police so i would advise you to
+not post these thing's on my page or send to my email.

 

"I done been waitin' on my porch for you to get me that job making money on postcards like you promised. I'm quicker than scat and got the senses of a billygoat, the wife done made a batch of fresh lemonade, we'd like you to come up for the weekend and train us."

 

LOL...y'all going up????

 

wow haha that is great

 

This was an actual voice mail left maybe a year ago, but I'll never forget it. I almost packed my bags, too, the thought of that freshly squeezed lemonade and meeting his 21 kids was alluring..

 

A voicemail? How did you let them get your phone? That's not required by CAN-SPAM the last time I checked.

 

Eat shit spammer

NIce and to the point :vroam:

 

"this is my dead aunts email, she's dead, please stop mailing it, thanks"

no joke.

 

from today :

I'd love for you to buy my house but I'm too busy fucking your father's ass. It's real tight and he likes it a lot.